Depression.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

I have no desire whatsoever to do anything.

People my age are supposed to be at their prime, going out, socialising, doing productive things. Excelling at their jobs. Doing good for mankind and society.

Well I’ve never been much of a social person, but lately it’s been getting worse. I get really tired talking to people. I just want to hole up somewhere, play my games, draw, read a book, be anywhere but around people.

People ask me if I’m sad about things. And they always want me to ‘talk about it’.

There’s nothing to be sad or to talk about. I have a well-paying job, a lovely boyfriend, a roof over my head, warm meals, warm bed. There is so much I have that other people don’t. I should be grateful.

I just feel this hollow, empty feeling inside me. Like a huge black hole of nothing. So how can you ‘feel better’ by talking about it when you don’t even feel sad in the first place?

So you see, I can’t really ‘cheer up’ when I wasn’t even sad in the first place.

I don’t know what I’m rambling about.

Oh well. Back to work tomorrow.

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